It's this store:
I don't know what's wrong with me.
I am not the target customer for this store. I don't even pretend anymore to be shopping for Jackie or presents. It's all for me, me, me.
You send me coupons in the mail? Well alrighty! Off I go to get Aruba Coconut Body Wash and may as well throw in a hand soap because they SMELL SO FREAKIN GOOD!!
What time is it? It's Autumn! Time to change over all the scents in the house to autumn flavors. It is no good to have a Peach Summer scent in the bedroom when it is after Labor Day... everyone knows it's time for Apples! And Pumpkin Spice! And Toasted Marshmallow! For my body, hands and floating in the air all around me.
Who needs testicles when I can have Cranberry Apple Cobbler Hand Sanitizer!
Jackie knows of my problem... she just requests nothing floral that will make us sneeze.
So when I'm 90, in full dementia, just remember to sponge bath me with Mediterranean Citrus Body Soap and I will die a happy man.
4 comments:
You can't buy floral scents because I cannot handle the floral. Reminds me of pregnancy, and vomit.
Jackie's comment for the win.
Also you raise a good point -- it is about time for some fall scents!
Happy Birthday!!! I truly hope you get yourself something memorable from Bath and Body Works. I find it hilarious - "I'm not even their target customer." Treat yourself! Maybe the body butter? Black fly style?
This is so funny. They do smell heavenly. But then I think why am I spending all this money just so I can SMELL yummy fall thing. Instead I wind up going home and baking pumpkin spice everything. Your method is probably much healthier.
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