Popcorn

So today at Hale while I was glitter gluing an art project, I looked up to see that 19 of my 25 students (the 6-9 yr. olds) were gone. I found all of them (boys included) in the girls bathroom. I asked them what was going on and a 6-year old told me- "We came in to see the poop that smelled like popcorn." I had no response to that.

Massage

Last night, Jackie and I went to get massages. We go to a massage school where you get an hour long massage for an inexpensive rate.

When my masseuse came and was walking me to the room, she asked what kind of massage I wanted. I told her I liked deep tissue and the last time I came, the masseuse did Russian and Swedish technique. I also told her that I had been playing the piano a lot this past week and she could work my lower back and upper gluts. She said that sounded fine.

I undressed to my comfort level (completely nekkid!!) and got under the sheet. The first part of the massage was uneventful- the usual face down, back, shoulder blades and neck. She then lowered the sheet pretty low (you would have seen my thong strap... if I had been wearing one) and started doing deep tissue (Swedish) on my lower back. While that felt great, I could tell she was a newer student and was a little nervous because I had asked to have my upper gluts done.

Soon the lower back was done, and after some fancy sheet wrapping to keep my modesty in check (as well as could be expected), my left bum cheek was ready. Now, I have had Russian deep tissue massage done before... but never like this. She proceeded to put both her hands on my cheek- and then rubbed them back and forth so quickly that, after a bit, you could have roasted a marshmallow over my scalding flesh. She then proceeded to whack and knead my buttock so hard it was as if she was preparing the dough for the morning rush at Cinnabon. After she asked me about the pressure- and being in pain, I could really only manage a thumbs up- she did more creative wrapping, and proceeded to give my right butt cheek the Indian Rug Burn of its life. Now I know that whenever my little sister was getting mad and giving us Indian Rug burns on our arms, she was just practicing her Russian massage technique.

Afterwards, my masseuse confessed that she hadn't taken the final yet on Russian so she was doing a variation of it on me (like a classical musician- Variations on the Left Butt Cheek by Mozart) and she asked me how I liked it. I replied honestly- I'd never felt anything quite like it.

My Summer of Hale

For the past 6 years, I've taught singing, dancing and acting classes at the Hale Center Theatre in West Valley. Classes are divided into 3 groups:

6-9 year olds

10-11 year olds

and

12-16 year olds

Now I consider myself to be a really good high school teacher- but after dealing with all of these different age groups from 9:00am-4:00pm- I am completely worn out.

In high school, I can always threaten uncooperative students with their grade- here, I can only threaten them by taking away their art time (and, since I'm kind of in charge of art, I use the term "art" very loosely- although I think I can publish a book on 1001 things to do with a Styrofoam plate).

In high school, students rarely have temper tantrums in class- here, during the June session I had a 6-year old girl that kept running out of the classroom whenever she didn't want to do anything. Finally I grabbed her on the way out and made her sit on my knee. She proceeded TO BITE MY ELBOW and call me RUDE. She later drew me an apology picture (where I appeared to have no arms).

In high school, I don't know or care when students use the bathroom- here, I had a 10-year old proceed to tell me he was late to production class because he "was taking a big #2".

High school students cry, but- here, we've had crying over:

a chair being moved

someone was being touched

we ran out of red paint

their top hat didn't fit

someone stepped on their hand

being asked to sit down

The best part of the day is Production Class- this is where each age group learns (singing and dancing) three different songs from different musicals that are linked by a common theme. One of the other teachers writes an original script where everyone gets 3 lines (they have to memorize them) and they make their own props. The best moment in June was when the oldest class was learning Seize the Day from Newsies- and we were going to have them make banners with the initials of the song- when suddenly we realized that fifteen 12-16 year olds would be holding banners saying STD. That would have been an awesome revue.

NYC Day #6 & #7

Ah Sunday. A day of peace, rest and contemplation. Also Father's Day- and no better way to celebrate than by eating 5x your recommended caloric intake than at Norma's. Norma's (a restaurant in Le Parker Meridian Hotel) serves what is commonly known as the best breakfast in Manhattan. They have an omelet on the menu that costs $1000- but the majority of the clients seem to order their pancakes, etc. (that cost around $20). After sleeping in a bit, we talked Jackie's parents and Arianne into going with us- and seeing that it was Father's Day (they don't take reservations) I thought we'd be in for a wait. Well, they told us 45 minutes (it ended up being close to 2 hours) until we were seated. Just so you know what we ordered, I got the huevos rancheros, Jackie got the Wa-za (a waffle with fruit inside and a bruleed top- picture to the right), Jackie's mom got the fresh fruit smoothie and something fruity, Arianne got something fruity, and Jackie's Dad shocked all of us by ordering the chocolate french toast with hot fudge, whipped cream and many other things I don't often associate with Jackie's father (it was very funny when our odd waiter told Ray that "he was a naughty boy").

After breakfast we wandered a street fair that was up and down 6th Avenue. We then met up at 2:20pm to take everyone to see the farce, Boeing-Boeing. Now I had read the script (it's pretty tame for a farce- farces usually involve multiple exits and entrances with slamming doors, mistaken identities, and something sexual- in this case the leading man (played by Bradley Whitford from The West Wing) is engaged to three flight stewardesses- one American, one German and one Italian. It's set in the 60's and his plan is screwed up when a friend from Wisconsin shows up and all the women arrive on the same day). I really didn't find the script that funny when I read it, but after seeing the show, what a difference a strong director and a brilliant no-fear cast can make. The German stewardess stole the show for me and the friend from Wisconsin (Mark Rylance) was utterly amazing to watch on stage (the 7-year old boy behind me loved it when he got hit in the face repeatedly with a white bean bag- something for everyone in this show).

After the show, we said goodbye to Arianne and Jackie and I took a group of about 14 people to Union Square to get tickets to Fuerzbruta- an aeriel show from Argentina. After sitting in Union Square for a bit, looking for someplace amazing to eat, we ended up walking all over Union Square, over to Chelsea and then back up to Times Square. It was fun seeing streets and places we'd never seen before- the weather was perfect for walking and it was a calm Sunday afternoon.

We ended up eating at the restaurant of a famous chef (Daniel Boulod) called db Bistro. It was good- but I'm not sure it was worth the price. After dinner, we walked by Radio City Music Hall where the Tony Awards were taking place. It was hilarious seeing people in tuxes and formal gowns grabbing a hot dog from a street vendor during a commercial break. After getting a slice of cheesecake from Carnegie Deli (a tradition I haven't broken yet), we went back to the hotel, watched the Tony Awards (we were thrilled that In the Heights and Boeing-Boeing both won major awards). After room checks, another day was done.

Monday morning, Jackie and I wanted to do some last minute shopping. We ran down to the Drama Bookstore so I could get some scripts for school. Then we went up to Rockefeller Center for some food (there's a Paris chocolatier that has macaroons that Jackie lives for), then it was over to serendipity 3 for a quick frozen hot chocolate. I got the peanut butter one and we got a regular one for Jackie's dad- only they don't make it to go- so I had to run a few blocks to grab a soda cup and straw to put it in. Then it was back to the hotel- all of our group's luggage had been picked up by bellmen and put in a conference room. Everyone came back, picked up their luggage and loaded up onto a shuttle. Off we went to the Newark airport (on the shuttle, my uncle Bob- a doctor- explained how Mira lax will help Millie's poo-problems- and set us up on a year-long plan. It was fun listening to pooping stories all the way to the airport).

Although we arrived in plenty of time, due to a storm coming in, all flights out of Newark, Laguardia, and JFk were delayed- instead of taking off at 5:30pm, we took off around 8:30pm. (at least they let us wait at the gate and not in the plane- Jackie's dad had the same 3 hour delay stuck in a plane). At least we made it out as well- some other travellers from Utah were flying on JetBlue and the flight got completely cancelled- which meant they had to go back to the hotel and stay an extra night at their own expense. We landed in SLC around 11:08pm- it felt hot and really dry- and we were happy to see our girls (and my parents were happy to return the girls to us....) Another trip to NYC completed! For those of you that like to plan far off, our next group trip will be June 8-14 2010. 6 shows will be included (5 musicals, 1 play)- we'll stay at the Sheraton New York and, best of all, it will be with me and my wife!! What could be more fun than that?

NYC Day #5

Ahh. Saturday morning. Nothing scheduled until 1:20pm. Most of the group meets at 9:30am to go to the Empire State Building. I accidentally lead the group through Little Korea- but thankfully the Empire State Building is hard to miss. Because we've done it before, the Coxes and us head over to the JP Morgan library. It's a really pretty museum- which has 3 Gutenberg bibles on permanent display. It also has his office- and- the man really liked his bibles because in part of his library, there are- no joke- over 1000 of them from all over the world. The Morgan museum also lots of manuscripts and sheet music from Mozart, Beethoven, Bob Dylan... but instead of those being on display, there was an old hunting manual. Oh well. It was still cool (and the gift shop had some cool books).

After that, we all had a hankering for peanut butter. We hopped in a cab (my first time) and headed down near Washington Square Park to a restaurant called Peanut Butter and Co. They make 6 different flavors of peanut butter (milk chocolate, while chocolate, fiery, cinnamon raisin, normal and some other kind I can't recall...). It was a really tiny restaurant so we all got our food to go (I got a white chocolate peanut butter marmalade almond sandwich- it was awesome) and we went to Washington Square Park, watched a woman loudly berate her drunken boyfriend and watched chess players try to lure people to play timed chess with them. We must not have looked like good players because we were not propositioned.

After lunch, my sister Arianne arrived at our hotel from Boston. We headed over with the group and saw, my favorite show of the trip, In the Heights. The show, created by Tony award winner Lin Manuel Miranda spends July 4th weekend in a small neighborhood in Washington Heights. Most of the people are immigrants from Puerto Rico or the Dominican Republic. The music (rap mixed with traditional Broadway) was great (as were the performances) and the dancing (latin, hip hop, break dancing, salsa, etc.) was amazing. Our group was happy it won best musical two nights later.

Leaving the show, a thunderous downpour caused most of our group to get soaking wet- and me going crazy making sure everyone knew where to go for their evening show.

After getting 1/2 price tickets for The 39 Steps, Ari, Jackie and I went to Eatery (no bugs in the salads this time) and then over to the show. We were happy a lot of our students were at the show- because it was great. The script is word for word the screenplay of the Alfred Hitchcock film The 39 Steps- only performed by 4 actors. 1 girl plays 4 female roles (each with a different accent), 1 guy plays the leading man and, the best part, 2 guys play over 100 roles (including a marsh, thorn bush, etc.). It was so theatrical it was great.

After the show, we met some people that had gone to see Curtains and took them down to Union Square to go to Max Brenners. I got a white chocolate coconut frozen drink- that instantly gave me 75 cavities. In summary:

The JP Morgan Library- Go Bibles!

Peanut Butter and Company- Yum!

In the Heights- Chillaxious!

The 39 Steps- Theatricagenius!

Arianne- Bostonian! (and hotel floor crasher)

One more thing- it was really funny how nervous Jackie and her parents were when Ari crashed on the floor and I called to have a blanket and pillow brought up for her. Well, I guess it just Ray (although I thought it would be funny if Ray had pretended to be me at the door- with his sister wives Renae and Arianne. Jackie was not amused by this).